Wednesday, 25 May 2016

Social Anxiety

Your mind is essentially intertwined wires, with signals shooting down each narrow path to give you your thoughts. Some thoughts are just facts absorbed. Others are taken from tiny pieces of information that trigger your imagination to create a completed story. Some of us have wires that like to twist, twist the information we receive to become negative, so negative that our body thinks it's in danger, like a lion is about to tear the flesh off of our bones.

When this process begins our wires start to spark. Our heart begins to race as though it is trying to run right out of our chest, the adrenaline rips through our body like a tornado destroying a town and then the feeling of impending doom begins. This triggers our stomach to want to erupt like a volcano, the heat in our body makes our cheeks set on fire and become red, our hands become sweaty, our senses become heightened and our breathing becomes difficult, like we are breathing through a straw. Then it happens, we feel it slowly creeping into the back of our eyes, the river of emotions is about to overflow. The tears start to stream down our face and we feel the need to run right out of this situation or fight.

But what is there to fight you ask? In reality nothing, in our head everything.

See we have let the current (information) run down an unintended (and unrealistic) path, causing our brain to short circuit. Once this has happened our battery is drained. We are exhausted.

Imagine feeling that every time you are put into a social situation? That is social anxiety. We can't just calm down, cheer up or snap out of it we just have to ride it out. Our body begins to work overtime to fight a threat that isn't actually there. The best thing you can do when you are with someone who experiences this is show us we are not in danger. Breath alongside us so we re gain a proper rhythm, give us a hug tell us everything will be OK or just stand by our side while we go through the process and be there when we come out the other side.

Sometimes just knowing we are not facing it alone is enough.

We may over react if you say something wrong or we may text you 2/3 times a day. We aren't trying to pee you off, our brains are just programmed differently.

For me personally if I don't hear from a friend I think they have fallen out with me or I have done something wrong, so I generally text them daily to check they are ok. If I am ignored or someone doesn't reply again I feel like I have done something wrong. My anxiety is triggered by the fear of being unliked and hated.

What are your anxiety triggers and how do you deal with them?

BethanyLouise xx

Thursday, 3 March 2016

Working With Anxiety

Hello My Lovelies,

I know it has been a long time since I posted anything.... my life has been pretty hectic and my health came first. I just needed a break from all things social media while I understood my problems and worked with a counsellor to help re train my brain (brain training as I like to call it)

I wanted to write a little something about working with anxiety because coming to work was one of the hardest things I had to do!

When I got diagnosed they instantly referred me for CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy) and I started the stage 2 pretty much straight away. The tips and tricks my therapist came up with really did start to help me with most everyday tasks and going out with friends. What I really struggled to do was put them steps into practice when I came to work. I mean I couldn't draw out a table in front of my boss and waste time weighing up the pros and cons now could I? So i had to start drawing this table out in my brain and try not to fluster myself as best I could. Sometimes I had to say I needed the loo just to have the 5 minutes to talk myself through it.

The things I struggle with the most at work are:

  • Going upstairs into the larger offices and talking to people
  • Questioning problems
  • Asking for help
  • Saying No to people if I don't have the time to do things.
Now these might not sound like the most scary things in the world, but seen as I have social anxiety I am scared of being disliked, so these can send me into a panic attack.

I have learnt to control my anxiety now at work by following my counsellors tips!

I have a video on youtube to explain my anxiety more I have popped it below for you :) 

If you suffer from anxiety feel free to get in touch with me and I will help you as much as I possibly can. I just hope this video explains everything I have been through :) 

BethanyLouise x